Thoughts of a single lady.

"We must fight mediocrity, destroy complacency, and scoff at the thought of being called lukewarm."

Relationships are weird.

                      Who decided the steps?

You meet. You talk. You flirt. You date. You marry. You have kids. You die.

Who came up with dating? I think betrothal is a much better idea. 

Date: the time in which an event occurs. 

It seems strange to me that we would call a romantic evening, or scouting for a potential mate, the time in which an event occurs. I mean, I guess it makes sense, in a very literal sense, but there has to be a better word for it in the English language.

And dating? The time in which many events occur? Not exactly how I would explain an intimate and/or committed relationship.. But, I can't come up with a better word so I conform to pop culture's lingo.


And marriage?
Who decided it was essential to a happy life?
I would say it just causes more problems.. In fact, Paul agrees with me:

1 Corinthians 7

"Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do. But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion... But those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this."

Long story short, Paul and I agree that it is easier to give your undivided attention to the Lord when you don't have a wife nagging you or a husband ignoring you.

Sidenote: I understand not all marriages are this way, I have witnessed many happy and successful, loving marriages, my parents are the best example. And I'm not saying that I don't want to get married, because let's face it, that's basically all I want: to be a wife to the man of my dreams. 

We've been so brainwashed in our "American Dream" culture that the keys to a successful life are a 9-5 job, marriage, and children. 

Subject Change...

Beginning in pre-school, we're constantly asked what we want to be when we grow up. I always said a stay-at-home mom because I thought that's all there was to life, marriage and children. Or a singer. As a preschooler, I was destined to be the next Britney Spears. Funny how our dreams never change..


And through elementary school, we're taught skills in all different categories so we can figure out what we're good at, capitalize on it, and use it to be a functioning member of society. 


And high school... We're forced to learn science, math, english, art, music, etc. We're put in gifted and talented programs, honors classes, and extra-curricular activities. We're judged on a grading system, and our success depends on this grading system and how well we conformed to it so we can be a part of this culture that we've been convinced is the only right way to live. 


Then there's college. Now our intelligence and success is based on a piece of paper. A degree stating we went to all the right classes, paid the right amount of money, and "learned" something, a certain skill, that will ultimately better society. 
Some people know their skills and how to use them without needing to go to college. Some people, like me, follow these rules and go to college hoping to find a skill. 


Don't get me wrong, education is imperative. It's beautiful and life-changing. But the brainwashing, and the conformity is not. 
Children in America dread going to school in the morning. Children in third-world countries long for the kind of education we take for granted daily. 


Our culture has taken beautiful things like love, marriage, reproduction, education, and success, and turned them into a rule and a guideline. Things that were privileges and blessings are now burdens and just "the way of life". 


Well, what if I'm not okay with conforming? What if I'm not satisfied with mediocrity? 
But what if I'm already so stuck that there's no escape? 
Of course I don't have an answer, and I can't do anything to change the way things are. 


But I do know:
I don't want to be okay with living a life laid out for me by someone else. 
I don't want to be another mediocre face in the crowd.